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"What am I doing?"
"What has meaning?"
"What is my real work?"
"Is this my real life?"
"Why do I drink so many lattes?"
I listen to Pema Chödrön audiobooks on the bus to work; she tells me that these thoughts/feelings are signposts, that my ego is experiencing the fundamental ambiguity of life. She tells me that sitting with these thoughts and feelings is the experience of Buddha nature.
...and it comforts me, a little, to think of Buddha, counting his lattes, gently weeping while collating papers and making bookkeeping adjustments in QuickBooks.
Today, it comforts me just enough.
